Lola and "Cute Nephew Joshua"...

I know! It has been quite some time since I updated the blog. I'm awful, horrible, and I do deserve to be sent to my room with no dessert. (hee hee...I've got some oatmeal creme pies hidden under my bed, but I'll never tell!)

Our internet connection decided to quit on us. Well, to tell the complete truth, we had some outdated cable connections and had to get new ones. But, we are back on and ready to blog some crap that'll make us all happy! So, smile dang it!

Here our daughter Lola is giving her favorite daddy kisses! Notice how I was thoughtful enough to have my goatee the same color as my daughters hair. I'm a loving daddy like that. But luckily you can't see the pretty purple bow I have in my side ponytail.

My sister-in-law Tracy and nephew Joshua both looking so cute! Josh turns "1" next month! Can't believe how fast these kids grow nowadays. He is such a happy kid, unless his "not-the-favorite-Uncle-Michael" scares him with his scary voice. Not Uncle Michael me...Uncle Michael-The-Other-Michael scares little children. Josh loves his bald-headed-purple-bow-wearing-Uncle-Michael.

Here Uncle Michael decides to teach our nephew the art of "feather boa" dancing. The poor kid better have a good therapist who won't think he is making up stories about his funny uncles when he gets older. Tracy is thinking "Hope my insurance will cover the type of therapy he will need in 10 years."

"These new french doors my Uncle Michael's got sure does look nice! I'll be sure to put lots of my fingerprints all over each window I can reach and act upset if "Mean Uncle Michael" tries to wipe my fingerprints off!"

What is it with cute little fingerprints on the window? I can't bear to wipe them off. Too cute! Michael TOM thinks it's because I am a sloppy housekeeper, but I'm nostalgic. Yea, that's a good reason...blame it on being nostalgic. And I'm saving the dust on the nightstand so our nieces and nephews have something to draw on next time they visit...

Just don't ask about the collection of "Little Debbie Oatmeal Creme Pie" wrappers under my bed.

Thinking of Poppy...

Poppy was my great-grandfather. He was well known for his inability to say a complete sentence without adding a curse word or two into the sentence. If you don't believe me, ask anyone in my family, and they will tell you that it is indeed fact. He never asked for a cup of coffee, he asked for a cup of #$%@ coffee. Even when Poppy was in a good mood, he would curse.

Why, you may ask, am I telling you about Poppy and his language? Cause the following picture was taken yesterday during the "installing the french door" experience. Look closely at my mouth. Poppy had taken possession of my tongue and I was in the middle of 6-7 curse words in a row when Michael TOM took this picture:


I try to watch my tongue, and I am not known for using colorful language, but that &^%$ door was ^&$(%@# pissing me off. It was only supposed to take about 2 hours start to finish. Taking out the old sliding door took up the first 1 hour and 45 minutes. So, I adjusted my schedule for it to take a little bit longer and promised myself to accept the change with a positive attitude and watch my language. (I swear! I did try!) But 3 minutes later, another "Poppy Sentence" rolled off my tongue while moving the new door to it's future location. That &^&%* was heavy! And I was already sore. It was justified.

Michael TOM and I push the new door into place, check to see that it is level, which it was, and then pushed the doors closed to see how beautiful it was. The doors would not shut. Neither of us could figure out what was wrong to make it not fit. It was like the doors were too big for the frame and we would have to shave about an inch off the side of one of the doors to get them to close. Several more "Poppy Sentences" were shared with anyone and everyone within shouting distance. This never happens on HGTV or on that show "Extreme Makeover Home Edition" when they do it.

Did it get any worse, you ask? Not just yes, but #$%@^ yes!!! Look at this next picture closely. Notice the 2-3 inch gap above the door? There isn't supposed to be any gap.

Boy, I spoke every curse word Poppy taught me and even made up some of my own. At this moment in time, I threw my hands in the air, called the store I bought it from and asked if someone could come to our house and finish installing it TODAY!!! After the friendly associate finished laughing, he said "no" but suggested I buy a smaller door. I do believe I blacked out at that moment, I am still unsure if Poppy took over my vocal cords and spoke some words of ignorance to the kid on the other end of the phone before I hung up.

Michael TOM called his father and within 5 minutes had a confirmed appointment with their handyman who would come over first thing this morning.

Ruben, the angel sent from "home-improvement" heaven, rang our doorbell at 9am. Three hours later, our door was perfectly in place with no gaps anywhere around it. Ruben never once asked what the hell I was thinking when I put in the door, and for that I gave him a little extra money.

But Ruben did say 27 "Poppy Sentences" before he was finished.

Not what you think...

Don't we all just look like 2 happy heterosexual couples? Nothing against heterosexuals...one of my closest friends is a heterosexual/breeder. I don't hold it against her. I believe she was born that way.

(Please no comments on the grey in my goatee. It's scary, I know, and it draws your eyes to it. I've decided that the grey makes my teeth look whiter.)

Please don't think that this was taken in our livingroom. If you look closely, there are fish sculptures and fish-nets hanging in the background with some scary looking Christmas lights by the window. We do not decorate in fish decor (Sorry Poppy - my great grandfather - who loved fishing and would spend hours on end telling you about how much he loved it) and never will decorate in fish decor. It's an unspoken rule in the gay world. We were at a greasy spoon restaurant out in the country. The kind of restaurant where when you pull in the parking lot, you just know that your waitress is gong to be missing more than half her teeth.

Tune in...my next post will be on the excitement we had this weekend installing french doors ourselves! Trust me, you don't want to miss it!