Monday, April 23, 2007

Yard Beautification Beginning

I woke up Saturday with a bug up my butt. Our front yard had just been blessed with a nice sprinkler system, and now it was time to add some flowerbeds before the new lawn arrives next weekend.
Here is a photo of what hard work can reward you with:

But, let's look at how it started...

No, this isn't an abandoned graveyard. It is actually our front yard. It would bring tears to the eyes of passerby and several flyers on our door from people willing to help with our landscape.
This was bought on "Trip-One-To-The-Neighborhood-Lowe's-Home-Improvement-Store." This picture is also proof to my chiropractor what caused my back to go out.
"Trip-Two-To-The-Neighborhood-Lowe's-Home-Improvement-Store" was to purchase more of the wooden borders. The expression on my face was a result of "tiredofgoingtoLowe's-itis" and learning that "Easy Installation" Instructions was false advertising, along with a mild case of "nobeerinfridge" syndrome.
No photos were taken of "Trip-Three-To-The-Neighborhood-Lowe's-Home-Improvement-Store" because I do not wish to be incriminated against. The trunkload of flowers was not enough, I was dirty, my 2-hour project was now in the 6th hour, and my Degree Antiperspirant was sweated off long ago. I walked into the Garden Center with steam literally screaming from my dirt-filled ears, the crowds of yuppy smiling amateur gardeners avoided eye contact with me and parted to make a path for me along the worn path to the discount flowers. The bubblegum-chewing Lowe's employee named Nikki (Like Nicky, but with and "i") who smiled big at me on trip #1 and #2 knew better than to smile or ask if I found everything okay. After paying, she popped her Juicy Fruit, handed me my receipt, and said, "See you later."

Funeral arrangements are pending for Nikki - with an "i".

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

WOW! My man is so butch, he put in a great day...and I did'nt complain when he walked in dirt & mud into the house.

Anonymous said...

Substitute 'Home Depot' for 'Lowe's' and you have a story of about every home improvement project I've undertaken.

Anonymous said...

WOW!

the MILKY way (Chrissy) said...

I think your yard looks terrific! Even better in person! I can't wait to see it with all the grass in place. I may roll around a little in your front yard. But only if there's no poo.

You guys did a super job!